This Just Doesn't Get Any Easier

We knew this day was coming. The day when Jim's counts would be high enough, and he would be admitted for another week of chemo. We knew he would be receiving the same chemotherapy drug as he did last time, and we knew he would be on the same medication he was on before to help counteract the side effects. There were no surprises and nothing we didn't expect, but we still found this day very difficult. Jim and I both shed tears again today as we continue to face this fight with cancer. I've been experiencing back pain that I am sure is related to stress, and Jim has complained of a queasy stomach for the last couple of days. It all seems pretty straightforward in terms of the protocol, so it surprised me at how difficult this day was.

We arrived at the Cancer Center at Lutheran Hospital at 7:30 this morning for a blood draw. Jim's counts were satisfactory and he was admitted, had a PIC line put in again through which to receive the chemo, and began the first chemotherapy treatment of the week by 1:30 p.m. I was able to spend the entire morning with Jim and some time again this evening. We were brought to our knees as we heard things going on around us on the Oncology Unit - a very sick man in the next room, moaning in pain as the nurses hustle to help him; an overheard conversation while in a waiting room of two daughters discussing hospice care with a social worker for their mother whom the doctors have said there is nothing more they can do. We are again made aware of how serious cancer is and specifically the leukemia which Jim is fighting.

Somehow, Jim continues to maintain a positive attitude and keeps his spirits high. He is very strong and trusts in his Lord as he continues to fight this disease. Today we found ourselves asking God for the same things we prayed for in the beginning when Jim was diagnosed with leukemia - a peace from God that passes all understanding, for His mercies that are new every morning and for the comfort we receive when we are still and know that He is God and is in control. The doctors and nurses seem to enjoy Jim as their patient and are all pleased at how well he is doing. Please pray that Jim would be comfortable this week and that the medications he receives to counteract the side effects would be effective. Also, please continue to pray with us that Jim would be completely healed of this disease.

Thank you again for your love and care for us and for all your concern and prayers.